Teaching Your Daughter How (not) To Dress

How would you define modest dressing? What are the exact parameters that separate ‘modest’ from ‘immodest’ dressing? Parents, especially those raising teen daughters must each be having their own answers to these questions. Modesty varies with culture, thus can be hard to define, modest dressing in the western world can be scandalous in Arab countries and cultures differ on the ‘strict dress code’ scale.

Interesting facts

One family however, is taking a different approach – by not enforcing any ‘modesty code’. Meet the Weber family. Mr. and Mrs. Weber are raising 6 daughters with ages from 5 -18. Jessica Weber’s answer to enforcement of a family dress code for her daughters is simple: They neither have any modesty standard, nor teach or try to enforce any( https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/why-this-mom-wont-teach-her-daughters-to-dress-modestly_us_59395838e4b0c5a35c9cd890?utm_hp_ref=clothing). They simply adhere to dress codes demanded by the places they visit otherwise she finds modesty standards subjective and undermining bodily self -autonomy. A point supported by the change in what can be termed as modest dressing through fashion history; miniskirts would not have been modest fashion in the 1800’s.

Weber modesty guideline

Her guidelines to her daughters on how to choose a modest dress are simple;
Practicality: Is what you are wearing practical for the weather or the activities that they will be taking part in i.e. can they comfortably engage themselves without worrying about their dressing.

Communication

Communication: What does your dressing communicate to others in the same setting as you, does your dressing fit to the societal norms of where you are or are going?
Protection; Are your genitals and other parts considered private protected from accidental public exposure.

Comfort

Comfort ability: this is in regard to the daughter’s personal feeling with having whatever part of their bodies that are showing being seen by others and if they will be comfortable with whatever someone might say about it.
So, parents, what are your modesty standards?

Leave a Reply